I am me and He is refining me daily

After, all of my insecurities that I thought I had dwelt with resurfaced last week and a battle for my mind was waged. Would I listen to the words spoken in the past? Words I doubt were ever spoken to crush or to impact the tender heart of a teenage girl and that would carry into adulthood. I had a choice to make: listen to the past words of hurt or to embrace the precious truths of my God's word. I have happily decided to focus on Him and His word. In His word, He speaks of my worth and value. I find love, forgiveness, mercy, and grace within its pages. Pages that say that I am worth dying for and loving in spite of my past. I have chosen to forgive and to move past those harsh words spoken. 

I may not ever measure up to the standards of those who surround me. Instead I may, always be called to be the one who stands out in her chasing after all that her God is calling her to. I am choosing to embrace and love the fact that my Abba created me with a different heart and mindset. He set the conviction in my heart at a young age what my love story would be like. In a family, who does not do courtships. It was a surprise when I at a young age about 7 years old I informed my parents I was going to have a courtship one day. They themselves didn't know what that looked like. They always dated and that is what my family does they date until they find the one who they want to marry. They may not understand, but I know what He has placed in my heart. My Abba, had/has different plans for me and my heart. Even though I have face great heartache in my life thus far. I know that I am secure in Him. He mends it all and it glorifies Him. 

I guess, the purpose for this post is to say that I am choosing to accept that I won't and most of the time won't fit the standards of those around me (Christians and non-Christians alike). I am me and He is refining me daily. I am being set apart for a reason and my whole life. Even though my greatest desire (besides having a deeper relationship with my LORD) is to be a wife and mama, I know that He has His purpose for my singleness. I am choosing, to surrender once again my heart and desire. I want to live a life glorifying my Creator. I am taking up my cross and following Him. I wait in Him and I am excited to do whatever is next in my journey with my first love, my Lord. 

Here in Ephraim or anywhere... if He leads I will go. I eagerly wait for my Abba's leading with my face raised up to the heavens. Where does my help come from? It comes from the LORD, the maker of the heavens and earth. I can't help but rejoice at where He has brought me and who He has made me to be. In my redemption, I know that He shines brightly and receives all the glory. I look forward to this coming school year and to see how different I am at the end of it. Until, then I am going to serve my LORD this summer and I pray that His light shines brightly. May He be seen in all my words and actions. I pray that if you don't know Him that you would come to know Him and His love before the end of this summer. He is worth it all.

With Love,

Stormy

Here are two pictures that were taken today of me after church. I wait in on my LORD and I set my eyes on Him.