I've been hit so many times from people telling me that I need to start putting myself out there on the "market". I hate that term by the way "on the market", it makes one sound like a piece of meat or something. Anyway, they tell me that I will never get married if I'm not letting guys know that I'm interested. I hear this a lot: "Do you think God to just going to drop him in front of you and say this is the one?" I know and believe that with God all things are possible! So yes, I do think that God will make it very clear in some way or another.
This wait for my future husband is worth every minute of waiting. Because each moment I wait, the more time I have to grow and deepen my relationship with my God. I have to be ok, with whatever God's will is for me and my life. Others may not understand, but the way I see it is this way... I want to save everything from my heart to my first kiss for my husband.
Is it wrong of me to remain old fashion? Is it wrong of me to want the man I love to respect me? Is it wrong of me to want to stand by my standards that God has called me to? The answers that I come up with to these questions are: No, it's not wrong to stand by what God has called me to. It's not wrong of me to want to know that my husband respects me and doesn't see me as "property".
It's hard to explain this to others, but I have such a love and respect for my future husband already. People ask, "how do you love or respect someone you never met?" Good question, I don't know myself it's a pure love that makes all the waiting and lonely times worth it. And if for some given reason me getting married is not in God's will then I'm going to have to be ok with that. Because I have God, and He is better than any relationship I could have here on earth. It would be nice however to have someone here to walk this Journey with.
As I watch as people wed my heart rejoices for them and yet it breaks within, because I feel as a piece of me is missing. God is my everything and I know I am complete in Him, but yet there is this longing in my heart which is crying out your beloved is out there. If he is out there and I'm not to remain single, I know that God is preparing the both of us. And this time spent apart is the time that we need to have alone with our creator, before our paths cross.
So here I am waiting, and praying that God will make whatever path He wants me to take clear. But whatever God's will, I will remain pure to what God has called me to.
I read this on BarlowGirl's website the other day and it brought great encouragement to me. It's nice to know that other girls out there are standing true to what God has called them to.
" yep... Were still rocking the purity" -Lauren Barlow
So in closing I say this: "Yep... I'm still rocking the purity!"
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2 comments:
I'm so proud of you! It's hard to stay clean in college, so good for you. I want you to know that I completely agree with everything you said. Dave and I met when we were 25 and Dave 27 and we just kinda knew. We dated for a year before we got married and I wouldn't have done it any other way! He is out there Stormy. Don't you worry about what everyone else says, as long as you are doing what is right God will give you what you need. :) I love ya girlie!
I think it just deleted my entire comment I just left for you, but I wanted you to know that I agree with everything you say. And also how proud I am of you for staying strong. It is hard to remain pure during college and I am so proud of you! Dave and I dated for a year and we didn't meet until I was 25 and I wouldn't have done it any other way. God has a way of knowing what we need and he will send it at the time that we need it if we do what is right and stay close to him. You are doing what you are supposed to so don't you worry. I love you girlie!
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